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Public Mother-Daughter Feuds

Mother-daughter relationships are notoriously challenging, just ask Candy and Tori Spelling. The famous mother-daughter team has had their tightrope walk chronicled in the media for nearly 20 years, and now their war of words has hit a crescendo. Claiming she’s been banished from her daughter’s life, Candy Spelling just posted an emotional public letter to Tori, pleading with her to end their bitter feud and repair their fractured relationship. “You haven’t responded to my emails, phone calls and text messages,” the 63-year-old widow of legendary TV producer Aaron Spelling wrote on her website. “You say you look at my website, … Continue reading →

Mental Health Week in Review: May 11-18

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It’s been a big week for family relationships in Mental Health this week as we looked at further ways of setting healthy limits for your children in Setting Healthy Boundaries for Your Children (3) and Setting Healthy Boundaries for Your Children (4). These two blogs complement the first to in this series when we talked about how it is important for parents to teach their children that they can, in fact, deal very well with the word “No”. In fact, it is imperative to their future health and happiness that they do learn how to deal maturely with the N-word. … Continue reading →

Walking the Mother-Daughter Tightrope (1)

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When a mother gives birth to a baby girl, there is potential for a tremendously strong bond to develop. Having a female child allows a mother to re-experience her own growing-up process, this time though the eyes of an adult. We mothers can see first hand the joy our children of both genders experience as they explore the world and gradually take charge of their own lives. But the mother-daughter bond is different. We can so clearly see ourselves in our own daughter as she grows up: playing girl-orientated games, choosing clothes, playing at being grown-ups, wearing your shoes, using … Continue reading →

Celebrating Mother’s Day When You Don’t Like Your Mom

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You can’t miss the occasion of Mother’s Day. Advertisers refuse to let us. Wherever we turn we are bombarded with loving images of mothers and babies selling giftware from flowers to facials, and everything in between. But what happens if you don’t like your Mom? There is a huge societal rule that says “everyone loves their mom”. This is so imbedded in our psyche that to admit that you don’t actually like your mother often results in surprised looks, sounds of disbelief or even a lecture. “How could you not like your mother?” the naïve, lucky ones say. Sure, mothers … Continue reading →

Walking the Tightrope of the Mother-Daughter Relationship (1)

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When a mother gives birth to a baby girl, there is potential for a tremendously strong bond to develop. Having a female child allows a mother to re-experience her own growing-up process, this time though the eyes of an adult. We mothers can see first hand the joy our children of both genders experience as they explore the world and gradually take charge of their own lives. But the mother-daughter bond is different. We can so clearly see ourselves in our own daughter as she grows up: playing girl-orientated games, choosing clothes, playing at being grown-ups, wearing your shoes, using … Continue reading →

Just Like Mom

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In my last post I wrote about Meg’s realization (or another step in the process of that realization) that she doesn’t share my genes. Healthwise, she will find that a blessing in later years. But for now, I shouldn’t have been surprised. All I have to do is think back to my own childhood. I didn’t look like my parents. I remember being asked rather frequently if I was adopted. (I wasn’t.) Because of the way recessive genes work, dark-haired parents can have light-haired children, although two light-haired parents cannot have dark-haired children. Ditto for eye color—brown is dominant, blue … Continue reading →

Having Trouble Talking to Your Teen: Try the Car!

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How common is it to have a problem with some aspect of your teen’s behavior and be told to sit down and have a good heart-to-heart with them? And how often has it ended in a screaming match and a series of slammed doors? Well, if it wasn’t common I wouldn’t be writing this article! It is important to talk to your growing teen about difficulties you are experiencing with them. Yet even with all the best intentions, it can be very frustrating if not outright difficult to do so. But it must be done if anything is to be … Continue reading →

What Kind of Relationship do You Want to Have with Your Kids in the Long Run?

We can get so caught up in the minutia of every day—those details of feeding, cleaning, discipline and communicating—that we forget to keep at least one eye on the long term. The choices we make today, and the way we parent and interact with our children right now will have a lasting influence on the type of relationship we have with them in the long term. While we really need to parent our children as they are today, it can be helpful to put some thought into what we would like our relationship with our child to look like 5, … Continue reading →

Author Interview – Richard M. Dudum

Yesterday I reviewed a book entitled “What Your Mother Never Told You.” Today I am joined by Richard Dudum, author of that book. Richard, thank you for taking time out of your schedule to be here. Your book is specifically geared toward teenage girls. Have you written or do you plan to write a book for teenage boys? Many of the issues covered in “What Your Mother Never Told You – A Survival Guide For Teenage Girls” are not gender specific. Both boys and girls can benefit from the book’s contents. At the same time, boys may feel a bit … Continue reading →