Suicide: What Do You Think about It?by Beth McHugh | More from this Blogger 01 Mar 2007 03:27 PM
This is an interesting question and one that produces a variety of responses. Some people go through their entire lives untouched by the specter of suicide; others have been exposed to it through the deaths of friends or family members. Others still have attempted suicide and have lived to tell the tale. And then there are those who think about it, yet do not take action. It is often said that people who commit suicide are selfish. I heard this as a child and I've heard it as an adult. I heard it just before Christmas. When I was younger I think that I agreed with the people who claimed it was a selfish act, because it seemed that those left behind suffered terribly and that is why the person responsible was held to be selfish. And those who are left behind do suffer terribly. There is no doubt that being emotionally close to a person who commits suicide is a painful experience. It is often an experience that brings up so many painful feelings: guilt, anger, unending grief, and the big one: "why?" However, I no longer believe that people who commit suicide are selfish. And I wonder just what on earth I was thinking of when I did have these thoughts. Clearly I wasn't thinking at all. From my years of talking to and working with highly distressed people, I know very well why people commit suicide. And yet, just before Christmas this year, a friend of a friend committed suicide. I did not know the person who committed suicide but I did know a couple of the dead woman's friends and it was interesting to note their response to the death. Actually, I was quite shocked. Next blog, I will tell you why. Contact Beth McHugh for further assistance regarding this issue. Related articles: Depression: Symptoms and Treatment (1) Depression: Symptoms and Treatment (2) What is the best treatment for depression? Feeling bad about taking antidepressants? When antidepressants aren't the best option (1) When antidepressants aren't the best option (3) When antidepressants aren't the best option (2) Chocolate may make your depression worse! Depression, antidepressants and sex Depression: The myth of "Chemical Imbalance" Learn more about Beth McHugh ![]() Beth McHugh began her career as a geologist and worked both in industry and as a university researcher. Relevantmental health tags relationships | marriage | children | christmas | family | pregnancy | Scrapbooking | parenting | sex | Kids User Comments babydawn (7008) 01 Mar 2007 04:18 PMIn 10th grade we were required to write a paper on a controversial subject. I chose suicide. My English teacher didn't care for what I wrote because I wrote that I also did not find it a selfish act. Although many of my views about it have changed as I have grown, I find that one thought on suicide stays the same.... how desperate must a person be to take their own life. It is human nature to save our own lives at all costs, so to get to a point in which one ends it seems like they must have reached the furthest depths of desperation, and as such, see suicide as the only solution. I know this is a touchy subject in religions as well. Many believe that those who commit suicide will be condemned to hell. I have different feelings. Although I do feel like suicide is a sin (thou shalt not kill), I feel like God is a just God and that he will take all things, including the mental state and health of the person, into consideration when deciding what that person's fate will be. Sara Denomme (1063) 01 Mar 2007 09:03 PMMy very good friend from high school found her mother had killed herself this passed holiday season. She certainly was not a selfish woman, in fact - I think she was probably one of the best mothers I've known. Sadly, about six years ago she was in a car accident that changed her forever. Whether it was the trauma of the accident, the medications for the pain, or the antidepressants she ultimately took because of either or both, she had since tried to kill herself SEVERAL times. She succeeded, and left behind my friend, her two sons and a husband, not to mention all of us who thought of her often. So I totally agree, people who feel like they need to commit suicide are not selfish. We will probably never know why she felt she needed to leave this world. Beth McHugh (13211) 04 Mar 2007 02:23 PMThanks, Babydawn and Sara, for your compassionate and thoughtful comments. To Julie I would ask: "How much pain does a person have to put up with to make others happy?" gunmenjim (22) 14 Feb 2009 03:29 PMWent trrough 4 yrs of off and on sevear depression as a teenager. Later in life felt what it was like to have all the skin burned of one leg with lots of 3rd degree. had an inflamed gallbladder removed, numerous abcessed teeth that couldn't be fixed faster than 24hrs. I have faith in morphine and novacane. that kind of pain is very selfish.. for anyone! I have no faith at 48 yrs I could last two weeks with the sevear depression I felt as a teenager. I could not carry out suicide then because of what it would do to my mom. but I learned two things for sure. I'm no longer afraid of physical pain. And I would never judge someone who died of suicide. A huge percentage of the population lives and dies without ever knowing what real pain combined with time is really like. sevear depression is a very goulish kind of hell, I have nothing to compare it to. selfishness is expecting someone to continue living in hell when thev'e been treated for years and keep going back to that state. Community Tags depression, grief, suicide, stress Discuss this article
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