Search Results for: blog helping an upset friend

Manti Te’o and the Girlfriend that Wasn’t – Part 1

Oh, as if my Notre Dame Fighting Irish haven’t suffered enough indignities due to their National Championship romp by the Crimson Tide, now a scandal has surfaced involving one of it’s most popular football players. Manti Te’o, in case you don’t know, was the Irish star linebacker.  A senior, he was nominated for the Heisman Trophy (he lost to Johnny Football) and no doubt coming off an undefeated season, was looking forward to all the NFL had to offer. Then, the bruising at the championship.  As if that weren’t enough, Te’o is now the center of a hoax scandal.  Through … Continue reading →

Think Before You Lend Money to a Friend

Nothing can come between friends faster than money except, perhaps romantic issues but that’s a different topic for another forum. There are many ways that money can create tension between friends, and sometimes the issues are so serious that friendships end because of them. Of course you value your friendships, but there are many good reasons that you and your friends should keep your finances mostly to yourselves. I am not suggesting that you never talk to your friends about money, because friends can often be great not only for listening but for helping you find new solutions or different … Continue reading →

11 Tips for Helping a Grieving Spouse

If someone your spouse loves, like a parent or close friend, dies, how can you help them? Here are some tips. 1. Remember how you felt if you were in a similar position but don’t expect necessarily that your spouse will react the same way you did in grief. 2. Show your love for your grieving spouse, even if you don’t know what to say or you’re frightened of getting upset or upsetting them more. Just be there for them. It doesn’t matter if you get upset. It might even help. 3. Let your spouse talk about their loved one. … Continue reading →

When a Best Friend Moves

We live in a mobile society. It is rather rare for a child to be born and grow up in the same house in the same neighborhood. This means that one of the realities our children often face is either when they have to move away from friends, or when one of their best friends moves away from them. Either way, it can be a very sad, mournful time and parents need to be attentive to help a child grieve and adjust. It is helpful if you child can know in advance that a friend is moving. While this may … Continue reading →

Helping Kids Deal With Stress

When we think of stress, we typically think about adults and stress but our kids are just as venerable to stress as we are. Some of the events that can cause stress to kids include: When their parents are having problems. Fighting with a friend or a sibling. Taking a test, grades, school and homework. Teens often stress over whether someone thinks they are attractive. Not having enough privacy. Transferring to a new school. Parent(s) remarrying. Not having enough money. Feeling a teacher does not like them. Peers, gossip and teasing. How do kids handle stress? According to a KidsHealth … Continue reading →

Friends and Mental Health (2)

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Last blog we looked at the importance of having positive people in our lives and the detrimental effect that negativity from others can have on our mental health. We also looked at how sometimes it can be difficult to tell the difference between a person who is good for our spirit and one who is subtly undermining us. We also saw the long-term problem that Katie was having with her friend Bree: a relationship that left Katie feeling both happy and strangely empty. Let’s look at another example of a relation that seems good but isn’t really working. Jo and … Continue reading →

Signing Part II

As parents my husband and I wanted to help our infant son to communicate with us what he needed and wanted.  Wanting to avoid at least some of the frustrations that come with trying to communicate with an infant (sometimes trying to interpret crying fits is futile), we started using sign language with our son when he was five months old.   After five months of signing with him, he finally started signing himself.  The first word he signed was “milk,” and lots of words followed. He started to sign “fan” and “up” and “more” and “all done” and “yogurt” and … Continue reading →

When Your Church Lets You Down (1)

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This is not an article about the place of religion in the treatment of mental health, it is merely a collection of anecdotal tales that are rather surprising given that churches are renowned for being in the business of helping people through difficult times. Of course, churches are run by fallible humans and we must expect problems from time to time. But it is a shame when a minister or senior church representative fails to offer even the most basic human care to a person suffering from an emotional problem. Let’s have a look at the case of Susan. Susan … Continue reading →

What is Dependent Personality Disorder? (1)

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We are all dependent on each other to a certain extent to survive. We need contact with other like souls for our mental health, and when we are ill we often need a helping hand to get us back on our feet. But what about a person who is constantly reliant on opinions, advice and help from others simply to get through the day? Lori suffers from anxiety and occasional panic attacks, but the root cause of these problems is her excessive need for approval, and her submissive and clinging behavior. The latter is driven by her fear of separation … Continue reading →

How to Help Those Grieving

Each of us will encounter loss at some point in our lives. So will other family members and friends, so how can we help those who are grieving. 1. Remember what it felt like to be in that position but don’t expect the other person to react exactly the same way you did in grief. 2. Don’t avoid the grieving person because you don’t know what to say or you’re frightened of getting upset and upsetting them more. When I was younger I admit to doing that at a funeral. I kept my distance from the woman grieving her daughter’s … Continue reading →