Coping with Sexual Harassment and Assault (1)by Beth McHugh | More from this Blogger 09 Jul 2006 05:40 PM Sexual assault in all its forms occurs across all age groups and in both genders. Unlike the stereotyped "rape" scenario, sexual assault is rarely carried out by strangers. One of the most frightening aspects of this often life-changing event is that it is most commonly performed by a person who is known to the victim. Sadly, it is not so much the dark-clad figure in the lonely park at night that is responsible for most assaults. It is the known and respected: the fathers, the uncles, the husbands, the boyfriends, the teachers, and the bosses. It is this latter aspect that makes sexual assault all the more difficult to cope with. But just what constitutes sexual assault? Even rape is not always a straightforward and easily demarcated crime, as many factors come into play, including proving lack of consent, and underage sex with consent. Although the legal system has guidelines outlining degrees of assault, it is our own personal barometer of what feels right and what doesn't that determines whether we feel uncomfortable in any given situation. Sexual assault, particularly in the workplace, may begin with sexual harassment. Often the comments or inappropriate touching that occurs as a feature of sexual harassment can be so seemingly "minor" as to make the recipient (usually a female) reluctant to report the incident for fear of being thought of as "petty." It is this way of thinking by society in general that allows both sexual harassment and sexual assault to flourish in a climate of silence and shame. Males often fail to understand how threatening a hand on the knee can be to a female when it comes from a person who is in a position of power. That power imbalance may take the form of a father/daughter bond or a boss/employee relationship. Either way, the experience of an unwelcome hand on the knee can strike fear and terror into the mind of the subservient partner. Even a grown woman often feels that to report the boss for a surreptitious "handling" will invoke ridicule, or worse, dismissal. It goes without saying that the child in this same scenario feels completely powerless. Understandably, more severe forms of sexual assault can have serious physical and psychological repercussions. In coming blogs, we will look at trusting your feelings, as well as what to expect if you are sexually assaulted yourself, including coping with bewildering feelings, the importance of speaking out, and accessing help. Contact Beth McHugh for further information or assistance regarding this issue. Related articles: Coping with Sexual Harassment and Assault (2) Coping with Sexual Harassment and Assault (3) Coping with Sexual Harassment and Assault (4) Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder: What causes it? Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder: Diagnostic Criteria Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder: Treatment Options Learn more about Beth McHugh  Beth McHugh began her career as a geologist and worked both in industry and as a university researcher. Relevantmental health tags christmas | children | Scrapbooking | relationships | pregnancy | sex | family | Kids | marriage | parenting User Comments mypaws (20) 22 Sep 2007 01:00 AMI need to find help for a problem that I have. My head is so confused and messed up over life. But when I consider everything I have been through and the state of loneliness that I am in I do not know what to do. When I was a teenager I had made friends with someone who had introduced me to smoking, cigarettes and marijuana aswell as alcohol. Within this group I also for the first time experienced pornography. It is all really horrible memories this situation. This nearly destroyed my life. I have gotten my life back on track but at the moment I am going through a lot of disfunction with regards to my life at university because of my own attitude and others as well. I do not know what I should say but when I was still living at home I found my self trapped on the internet surfing pornographic sites. It is still a problem say 3 to 5 years later. But I like to think that I am in control of myself. I spent so much time trying to just take my brain away from all the content that I was immersed in. Personally I feel wronged because all the information relating to pornography available on the net is not adequately concealed by the corporations that index web pages and make enormous profits out of the technology. Of course the reason why they make it available is because they do stand to make more money. But I am so sorry that things are the way they are. I was only a young adult and in my reality I was just trying to fill the gap in my life because I had become isolated and alienated from society because I had moved away from the city into a rural area and did not have any idea of how to cope being in a new environment. It had made me feel so sick and I really need to talk about these things with my therapist. I do not know what else it is that I can say except that I am having incredible difficulty trying to overcome my regressing emotions. On top of all those things I was given no direction by my family. They insist that I am sick but I am really lonely and I am afraid of getting hurt and rightfully so because I do open up and I get attacked down. This all seems so pointless and that I am just venting but at this point in time I need to find someone to rely upon and that I can trust. I wish I could create a situation where I can replace the bad memories with good ones. Feed Back = ( I am so sad! mypaws (20) 22 Sep 2007 01:05 AMHow am I supposed to accept what has happened. If I feel that this person is sabotaging my relationships and that I am hurting in side. Where can I turn to get help? I just have no one and all I wish for is to have understanding and never have to feel these emotions of loneliness and fear. Keeping things inside is so bad and I think I am going to have to do something about this. All the problems that I have considering how much I have discussed with counselors and how little they are prepared to help me find a solution. For three years I just talk with the same person and they never try to help me or to identify my problems. It is not like I tell her everything because I am too ashamed. I see a new therapist and I want to tell her everything.  Beth McHugh (12962) 22 Sep 2007 01:57 AMHi mypaws, if you think I may be able to help you, you can visit my website at http://youronlinecounselor.com Community Tags abuse, counseling, neglect, porn, rape, sexual assault, sexual harassment, trauma Discuss this article
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